@Lisa- oh, I know the transaction costs are huge. Also, any house we bought would likely need some work too, so the choice isn’t either pay to move or pay for contractors. It’s just pay for contractors or pay for both! In looking at a lot of houses over the past few weeks I’ve been reminded of how much I like about our current house, especially since we’ve done a lot of work on it over the past 8 years to match our tastes.

As someone in the midst of moving with only one child, I think you are wise to modify your house v trying to find something that will work for your growing family. Moving is SO MUCH WORK, especially with a young child in tow. I told my husband that I’m committed to living in the next house until we retire. I know that dealing with contractors is a total pain in the butt, but I think in the long run, it’s better than moving? Buying/selling houses is just so expensive – especially on the selling end if you have a house with a high market value. When I worked in mortgages, we assumed that people would net 90% of their purchase price when calculating whether they had enough equity. 10% is fine for a $300k house but when you get up to $500k, that is a lot. 10% is probably an over estimate of the cost to sell, but I’d say at least 7%, so if your house is a $500k house, that’s at least $35k. So instead of paying all of that money in contract costs, I think you are better off putting that $35k towards remodeling expenses!! (we opted to move instead of remodeling/building onto our small house as we knew our current home 1400 sq ft home wasn’t the right kind of house to add onto/renovated). Granted, some day we will have to sell our house and pay for those selling costs! 😛

Agree with this completely. Work is a really good way to get out of your own head, especially when you are dealing with other people. My mother always tried to get me to clean the house when I was in a funk, and I stayed grumpy to spite her, but sometimes physical labor also does work out some of the “I hate everyone and everything” energy…especially if I put on some appropriate music.

I will add to the voices saying there’s nothing wrong with getting some pharmaceutical help when you need it. My bad moods tend to go down hill really fast and end with me being angry and snappy at everyone (kids included), ugly crying at work (in my private office) and generally making things worse. So if I can catch it before the storm hits, I take ativan. It’s doctor prescribed and approved and not a strategy for someone having a lot of bad days, but for my 1-2 a month it’s been a huge help.

@Omdg – there is something to be said for a job that gets people out of their own heads! On the completely opposite end of the labor scale, I had this experience working at the counter in a fast food restaurant for a while. The rush would start at 11:30 for lunch and I’d look up at 1:30 not remembering a single thought I’d had in the interim…