@Kathy- thanks, I’m happy to hear they are encouraging!

One of the things I like best about your posts is that they make me feel like big accomplishments are possible!

I agree with the article and this likely happened with my oldest child. My husband defers to me a lot with him (now 13). When my youngest was born, I went back to work very quickly because I felt well and my husband had a procedure that kept him home for 6 weeks. I only took 2 weeks maternity leave before handing him to his daddy. With our youngest, he is the primary. Our daughter (middle) got us both. We both were off 8 weeks with her. But, had I had the usual maternity leave situation.. I could see where this would have come into play.

The article is just about why mothers may seem better, juste because they are more experienced – not about cooking vs. laundry…

About this topic, I’ve read an article lately, that explains how, thanks to maternity leaves, a mother can become the “expert” on her child and then why she’ll become the prime care giver although the couple is determined to share infant care. I really loved this article and hope this might be of interest for you, Laura.
http://www.popanthro.org/index.php/PopAnthro/article/view/142

I’m blessed in this regard because our duties were split by preferences. I trained in kitchens before making a radical career change. I love to cook. He doesn’t love laundry, but he does not like my willy-nilly approach to laundry. But this little bump in our road has made me wonder if we shouldn’t cross train each other a bit!

@Jennie – yep! One key thing for many couples is not accepting that someone (usually mom) is inherently better at whatever child or domestic task is up for debate. Often, she is “better” just because she is more experienced. The other party could become an expert with practice.

I hope you are doing well and recovering quickly.

I have a great example of this. I am on bed rest due to surgery (it’s killing my soul). Our household duties are pretty evenly split. My husband does laundry, ironing, and the like. I cook meals and clean up the kitchen, and the housekeeper does everything else. Both of our duties are daily jobs. However, I can’t perform mine. Now he could have taken the easy road and got take out and he did for awhile, but we live in a rural area with few options so that got old pretty quick. He has been preparing dinner for the last few nights. Dinner takes me less than an hour from start to finish, complete with packing next day lunches, and getting the kitchen back in order. Bless him. Last night it was almost 9:30 before he finished. It took him almost 3 hours. I do this daily and have for 15 years. I know where everything is, what I have on hand, and have it down to a science. I thought he would give up and go back to take out, but he said he was planning to cook tonight as well. He is determined to get the hang of it. I may have to take a page from his book and buckle down on a few of those difficult tasks.