I’m also enjoying comparing each week’s time log with the corresponding week in 2016 (when December 12th was last a Monday). That was another full and festive week, with a few noteworthy items. First, I enjoyed the bra-fitting party I won (in a raffle) at Rigby & Peller, however…that means that the last time I went bra shopping was now 6 years and one baby ago. Which means that I probably need to go again (unfortunately that boutique closed, so I’ll have to figure something else out.) That was also the week that my TED talk video went live (on Friday). I spent 30 memorialized-on-my-time-log minutes sharing it out with my lists. And that was also the Saturday that was memorialized in Off the Clock as my long December day featuring breakfast with Santa at Longwood, my then first grader’s wrestling meet, taking the train into NYC with him to meet the other kids and my husband, going to the same party we actually went to this past weekend too (so cool to still be celebrating with the same friends), going to my old choir’s concert, retrieving my car in Trenton and driving home in dense fog.

My point in Off the Clock was that it was a long, stressful day with many transitions, but that what I remembered afterward was the glorious poinsettias in the greenhouse, the referee hoisting my little wrestler’s arm up in victory, the choir singing ethereally of warmth, wonder, and birth. And similarly, what I will most remember of this weekend’s NYC visit is seeing a lot of lovely Picassos in the Met, and talking with old friends. It’s just that experiencing that required a lot of battling traffic to get into NYC, and taking an incredibly crowded subway up from our parking spot to the Met, and so forth.

I think we can extend the metaphor, that memory requires a lot of bother. That was my experience with taking the five children to breakfast with Santa this year. My daughter had found a breakfast-with-Santa event at Neiman Marcus in the mall, and the tickets were not cheap, but this was her number one request for holiday activities. So we went, and the kids fought and misbehaved and the 7-year-old ate literally half a piece of bacon BUT in the photo with Santa they all look really happy. So there’s that.

(After, we wandered through the store on our way out and the kids could not get over the existence of a $400 pair of children’s shoes, so at least they seem to have my frugal streak.)

Anyway, here’s how I did on the Tranquility by Tuesday rules this past week.

Rule #1: Give yourself a bedtime. Mostly. I tried on Friday night since I had to get up at 5:40 a.m. to take the 15-year-old to catch the bus to the competition. But I lay awake for a while. It was not a great night of sleep. I managed to get in bed by 11:30 p.m. on Saturday night, even though we arrived home at 11:10 p.m. That was some swift work!

Rule #2: Plan on Fridays. Yes – though not the kids’ activity schedule. I did that Sunday. I’m trying to move it back, but enough stuff shifts that it seems pointless. I’m also going to start planning out my workouts, now that I’m trying to go to the gym more often.

Rule #3: Move by 3 p.m. 7 for 7 this week, though one was a ridiculous short walk in the cold rain. I went to the YMCA twice to lift weights (I then usually run 2 mi on the treadmill too). I’m going to aim to do this more regularly during the winter, partly because I’m starting to feel resentful of running in cold weather, and also I think the strength-training will help with my occasional back pain. (As would not carrying the almost-3-year-old so much, but I’m not sure what I can do about that…)

Rule #4: Three times a week is a habit. I ran four times this week (2x at the gym, 2x outside). I played the piano three times. As for family meals, my husband was traveling the first half of the week, and the kids had activities, so our breakfast with Santa was the only time all seven of us were at the table together! This week starts to calm down so that should improve.

Rule #5: Create a back-up slot. I left Friday open as usual, and managed to make it through my punch list by noon. That’s why I was able to go to the gym that afternoon!

Rule #6: One big adventure, one little adventure. There were lots of adventures, as described above (Nutcracker, NYC, breakfast with Santa) but I’ll call out a little adventure…On Wednesday night I went to a local retirement community to help with the carol sing (the woman who organizes it is in my church choir and wanted some ringers to make sure that the carols went well!). I had never been in their main building before, so it was a little adventure to see this building I have run past so many times, and see how it’s all decorated for Christmas.

Rule #7: Take one night for you. I went to choir rehearsal on Thursday night, and sang lots of Christmas music there.

Rule #8: Batch the little things. I had a substantial “punch list” for Friday, which included making dentist appointments. But that is done!

Rule #9: Effortful before effortless. My phone seems to be working again, which is throwing off my calculation of whether I should replace it before some holiday travel. However, I spent less time than usual on it (I think) because the week was busy. As for downtime, I finished my second Christmas-themed 1000-piece puzzle, and started a third. This one has matte rather than glossy pieces so I am liking it a bit less but oh well. It will suffice. My kids and I finished the Lego holiday village. We worked on it in my office with the gas fireplace going, which felt festive. I finished The Tempest, and am now reading The Two Noble Kinsmen (not in the anthology, so I’m reading it online). I will also give myself points for mostly reading The Economist rather than scrolling during the kids’ ice skating lesson.

How did your week go?

I had a car service booked to pick me up at 7:45 a.m. for a 10 a.m. speech. Normally they show up 15 minutes ahead of time, so I was ready by 7:30 to give us a cushion, since the traffic report said it would take 2 hours at rush hour.

Then I waited and waited. I called dispatch, and got put on hold, then had someone answer who tried to track down my driver, but that took a while for them to get through. Meanwhile the minutes were ticking away.

I (and dispatch) finally found out that the driver had gotten a flat tire. That was in the process of getting fixed, and they could send a replacement car, but of course that was going to take quite a while too. So I got in my own car at a little after 8 a.m. to drive to a 10 a.m. speech two hours away. You always lose time in transit on the NJ Turnpike, and I did too.

So, irony: I was late to my own speech on time management.

It has happened to me before (I joke about it in my TED talk). I imagine it will happen again. I’d sent an email to the organizers and my speaking agent, and they all worked it out so the group could re-arrange the morning schedule. I spoke at 10:30 instead of 10. All was fine.

So at least that wasn’t disastrous, though we shall see what mood my 7-year-old is in when I get him at camp. He opened his lunch and apparently found an ice pack but no food. I know I packed it – I did that last night and put it in the fridge…so where did the food go?? Mysteries. The camp called while I was giving the speech so I couldn’t pick up the phone. They fed him a camp lunch (they do have a purchase option) but given his “selectivity” I suspect it all went in the trash. So I will pack a hearty snack for the car and prepare for the complaints.

Life goes on. Two days until the weekend!

The aftermath of this disaster consumed seven hours of what was already an incredibly busy week. Seven hours is an interesting number, because it is the equivalent of “finding an extra hour in the day!” — a promise I have read on a great many magazine covers. And yet, if we had sat down at the beginning of the week, and tried to find seven hours for something like training for a triathlon or setting up a new mentoring program, I imagine we all would have struggled.

So what happened? Basically, time is elastic. When we decide that we need to do something, we find the time to do it. Other stuff either doesn’t happen, or it takes less time, or it gets punted forward. Much other stuff turns out to be more malleable than we might have imagined. And so, of course, the key to time management is treating the things we *want* to do with the urgency of the things we *need* to do. We make time for them first, and let everything else take the hit.

Easier said than done, to be sure. But I keep trying. This week, for instance, has turned out to have more time-consuming stuff in it, mostly personally though some professionally, than I planned. Such is life. I also had planned to take Thursday afternoon “off” for some little adventures from my winter fun list (visiting a greenhouse, seeing wintry scenes at an art museum). When I lost big chunks of focused time on Wednesday with the delivery window fiascos, Thursday was an obvious back up spot.

But I decided that time is elastic. I would probably feel behind one way or the other, whether I did my adventures or not. Better to have the adventures in this time I’d allotted and trust I’d figure something out.

So I did. Nothing life changing. A 30-minute stroll through the Brandywine museum looking at Andrew Wyeth paintings. About 90 minutes at Longwood looking at orchids and wintry meadows. Home in time to log another hour of work before dinner. But Thursday felt a little more memorable than it would if I’d stayed at my desk. I’m sure everything will fit one way or another.

Photo: Scarlet-plume from the Longwood greenhouse