We did this on my 40th birthday Disneyland trip as well – I literally planned our outfits so they’d all coordinate and had one day of custom made matching t-shirts. But it was something I worked on for weeks before the trip to make sure everyone had clothes that fit, etc. I do this because I’m a scrapbooker and love having those “perfect” photos which means I always had to take several bc someone was always melting down or spilled their lunch or whatnot. I’m guessing most people would not have the patience for this kind of bs but I thought it was fun 😀

That’s another thing I’m realizing as I get older – some people legit find stuff fun that I think is ridiculous, or boring or whatever. Like all those people baking bread during the pandemic. I had NO DESIRE to do this but when I saw those photos, I thought “should we be baking too?”. I definitely take breaks from Instagram and have mostly dumped personal Facebook as well (I have a couple of groups I love though for specific hobbies).

I think it’s totally age because I’m feeling the same way, more and more.

I’m with you. I have two (awesome!) kids and a great life, but hearing about Laura’s #4 and #5 little guys made me super wistful and regret that I didn’t start earlier (had #1 at 34, #2 at 37, doc suggested I maybe not have any more based on medical stuff and age). It’s sort of a “path not taken” thing for me, more than specific STUFFF.

Another one for me that falls into that same category is hearing about my college classmates who have sold startups to Google, Microsoft, etc., are published on those ‘Top 40 under 40’ etc lists, or have won MacArthur Awards. (No joke, there is more than one.) Something about that makes me feel like I’ve squandered my great education and career opportunities despite the fact that I made specific choices to prioritize my home life and I know it. But as I get older, I’m realizing I’m actually happy for those people, maybe because I know them. And with people I don’t know, I have no idea what their lives are like so why would I want to trade?

Laura–this is a great reminder of why I enjoy reading your blog. You often are clear about the reality, work, and trade-offs that accompany our choices. For instance, I think a few years ago, you took a baby-free trip with your big kids. I don’t think I would make that choice, but I appreciated you showing that you do not “have it all” but that you make choices to prioritize what is important to you and your family. I am also so encouraged by your posts about family outings that include meltdowns and whining. People often omit those details from social media, so you feel envious of that mom who took her kids to the apple orchard without realizing that the cute pic was 5 minutes of a really long day (but still worth it, overall). I also appreciate how you are upfront about using childcare to get time to do things that are not work because I think this has allowed me to reframe the childcare in our family. Now if I want kid-free time, I don’t just get angry/annoyed at my husband, but I see it as a problem to troubleshoot.