But there are little bright spots as usual, and a moment on Friday that made me grateful. I will admit that I was nervous about the 6-year-old’s parent-teacher conference. I don’t want to write too much about specifics as my kids get older but longtime readers know that he is…spirited. This plays out in various predictable ways. There had been a disciplinary incident on Thursday night at one of his activities that had me quite upset.

Anyway…his first grade teacher, bless her, is a wonderful person who has her methods for dealing with 6-year-olds (for instance, she hands out sheets of scented stickers like they’re candy on Halloween). She told us that he was a joy to have in class, and such a sweet boy, and that he had told her he was nervous about the conference (!) but she said he shouldn’t be because he was doing a good job.

Cue me finally exhaling. I then remembered that he had told me he had put something for me in his desk.

So we all went to look and this little sticky note is what I found. He is a sweet little boy. I left him a note too!

1. When it comes to building a career, sometimes you have to think in terms of investment. I have worked long, tough hours this year. Not 80 hours a week since, as I’ve written many times, few people do that, but long hours nonetheless. The frustrating part of this is that 2010 was one of my lowest earning years ever. I know why. I haven’t been ghosting anyone else’s books, writing front of book stuff, etc. Just books and longer bylined articles. Which is what I want to be doing, and I do believe it will eventually pay off. However…
2. Investment is easier when you have a cushion: either savings, or another income-earner in your household, and an expense structure that doesn’t require both of you to earn a certain amount. Frankly, though, I think this is a much better reason to save than for retirement: to have the freedom to pursue a career on your own terms — hopefully one you’ll never want to retire from.
3. Time spent building a network is never wasted. This year has involved a lot of reaching out to people, and asking for support. People have been so willing to help, and the act of asking for help has strengthened these relationships. Just two examples: This spring, I emailed Alisa Bowman and told her I had a book coming out. She immediately ordered a copy, then sent me the names of three other writers/bloggers to contact. All of them (see here, here, and here) wrote about the book in one way or another. Stephanie Vozza, likewise, emailed me about something, and I asked if she could help promote my book. She wrote about it and gave me the names of others, which led to this, this and this.
4. Books take time to write, but then they act as an additional PR person. I write better than I talk. People read the book, then reach out to me. (Like the Great Day St. Louis producer mentioned in this video). Cool!
5. Even 24 hours can have amazing highs and lows. On the morning of June 28, I was on the Today Show, which was a lot of fun (especially since they were so positive about 168 Hours). By afternoon, I was watching my book soar up the Amazon rankings. Then I got on a plane for Michigan with my 2 children, we got delayed, my newly potty trained 3-year-old proceeded to soil the seat, the baby screamed and I had to rely on the kindness of strangers to make it through that flight.
6. 5 hours is a long time to be running. I don’t mind half-marathons, but training for a marathon took more time than I can sustainably make a priority.
7. Singing brings me great joy. Time spent singing and helping build my choir (which sold 700 tickets for the Christmas concert, raised $10,000 when we asked for it, recently landed the South Street Seaport caroling gig, and will perform at the American Choral Directors Association conference in Chicago in March) is time well spent. I will miss YNYC if we leave New York.
8. Babies are tough for the first year and then they get easier. Sam is starting to entertain himself. My mother-in-law and I took him out for lunch today, and he sat next to me in the booth and dipped his chips in the salsa, which is crazy when you think that 2 years ago — just a bit over 17,500 hours! — he was nothing but an egg with potential. Two years from non-existence to knowing that when you sit in a Mexican restaurant, you put chips in the dip.
9. Memories are pleasant, even when the experience is tough in the moment. Case in point: Going to the American Museum of Natural History was fun on Saturday, but we wound up having to hike back in the cold through Central Park, take a bus and then hike from 5th Avenue, with me carrying Sammy for big chunks of it. Painful. Those last two hours were long. But now it seems nice in retrospect that we all went to the museum together, and then had a walk in Central Park. Lesson: do it anyway. If you look only at current inconvenience, you’ll never spend time on things that will provide happy glances in the rear view mirror.
10. Time spent fantasizing is productive. Because it sees you through tough times. About three years ago, after I’d spent my first 6 months trying (unsuccessfully) to sell what became 168 Hours, I had a vision, as I was walking past Borders, of my book splashed in the window. I kind of seized on that image, that it would eventually happen. In time. Then, this summer, I got off a plane in O’Hare, walked toward the book store, and saw multiple copies of 168 Hours displayed, prominently, next to The Help. Again, time well spent.

What have you learned about time (or money) in 2010?

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